Some thoughts, experiences, analysis, reviews, observations . . .

Tuesday, November 11, 2014

Interview Bloopers

Over the last few years that I have been conducting interviews at VN as well as at my earlier jobs, there have been many memorable instances, some of which I’d like to share with you all: 

Mother India

Aniket: “What is your goal in life?”
Candidate (Female,22/23 year old fresher): “To have a baby!”
Aniket: “How can ValueNotes help you in that?” (I was going to say ‘how can I help you with that’ …. But that would have sounded like Ranjeet or Prem Chopda!)

Aniket: “Can you tell me about yourself?”
Candidate: Ignores my question and keeps on following a fly which is flying around the conference room.
Aniket: “Excuse me!”
Candidate: Still can’t get his eyes off the fly!
Aniket: “Ok Spiderman, you can catch the fly first …. I’ll wait!”

The Stalker

Aniket: “So where are you from?”
Candidate: “Sir, I am also from Mumbai.”
Aniket: “Also means?”
Candidate: “Sir, I know you are also from Mumbai!”
Aniket: “Huh?”
Candidate: “I saw you come in the morning at 9.07am in a blue Indica car with a MH02xxx number. You were wearing dark glasses and carrying a black bag. You parked behind the black santro whose number plate was MH12xxx. You removed your dark glasses and kept then in the glove box and wore your spectacles……….”
 Aniket: Nearly jumps out of the window!

The Ata Majhi Satakli girl

Aniket: “So, how are you doing today?”
Candidate (female): Literally jumps out of her chair and says “WHAT? WHAT DO YOU MEAN?”
Aniket: (Literally quaking in his shoes) – “I just asked how you are.”
Candidate: “Oh like that! I thought …………..”
Aniket: (forgets all the questions he was planning to ask! And is still shaking!!)

Humpty Dumpty

Aniket: “So what did you do after college?” (This is a few minutes into the interview)
Candidate: Just slips from the chair and plops on the ground! Funnily he stays there for some time till I get up from my chair to see where in the seven hells he had disappeared! He is still sitting there crossed legged staring at me!
And then he says “Sir, I want to go home!”

Needless to say none of the candidates were selected!


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